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3am Blog

It’s 3am, and I should be sleeping. Instead, I’m typing on my loud-ass keyboard, writing just to keep the anxiety at bay. There’s no one reason for it; right now, I just feel a little stuck in the mud. Sometimes, it hits like a tidal wave, so I’m grateful for what’s lacking this time around. My mind is swirling, convoluted with too many thoughts. Thoughts about the sad state of the world and my country. Thoughts of disappointing people and being disappointed by them, too. Inevitably, I’ll circle ’round to thinking of my Dad. Then, I feel ashamed. I’m a great mom, but I could be better. I’m a loving wife, but I could be better. I’m a semi-talented writer on a good day, but I could be better. In short, the world is on fire, but everyone’s too busy either pointing the hose at themselves or claiming it’s only smoke. Reprehensible words and actions are cheered, while the very people holding up this country suffer. Families lie, hide secrets, and may wear the most elaborate masks of them all. We shame those we should be helping. We, humans, are not a civilized race. We are, on average, immoral, greedy, and egotistical beings, justifying it all in the name of ourselves. We’ve decided we can do whatever we want. We’ve decided we are the rulers of this planet and have reigned over it all with ignorance and selfish goals disguised as progress. When will we realize the depth of our ignorance? I fear it may be too late.

7 thoughts on “3am Blog

  1. This is well said. Too many people are waiting for someone else to fix the world, or are too greedy to give a crap either way. Earth will resemble Mars in 30 years and then their dirty money will mean sod all because even cockroaches wont be able to survive on Earth.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. To be fair, it’s not like I’m doing much from my desk. It’s a sad truth, but I think the bleak future of Earth and humans is inevitable. That doesn’t mean I’ve given up trying to be the best person I can be, but it sure makes it a lot harder to have hope that it means anything at all.

      Liked by 1 person

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